Adjustments

The first day of work was like work anywhere. You read a bunch of stuff, meet people, and attempt to look busy. My Chinese co-workers are fascinating to behold. They are extremely disciplined, focused, and deliberate. They are huge into punctuality and consider it rude if you're even a second late. They realize they have a really good job and won't do anything to threaten it. They don't surf the net, talk on the phone, do the “water cooler thing,” etc.

It's so funny to contrast with American work life. I bought a really funny book before I left called “And Then We Came to The End” by Joshua Ferris. It's like the “Office Space” of books. I can just tell it's going to be made into a movie. It's about life inside a Chicago advertising agency. One of the characters checks out books at the library and then photocopies them at the office. He spends all day reading the sheets at work and it seems like he's working. Almost too true to be funny.

At lunch time, they took Scarlet and I down to the parking lot. They said they just usually pick some food up and go back to their desks. Lunch is an hour and a half here because they sleep during part of it. Apparently most of them pick up this little lunch tray from a lady in the back of a van. In any other city it would look like a drug deal is going down. The meal was extremely cheap, 6RMB – less than $1USD. It was pretty bad though. The few pieces of mystery meat had tons of bones. There was a little side salad and some vegetables and of course white rice. I started chuckling as I was chewing it thinking about my earlier refusals of going to Blake's Lotaburger because it's “not sanitary.” The portions were so small – and we wonder why they're so thin! Scarlet ordered two of the trays and we went back up to the office. Everyone was basically eating and surfing the net (OK at breaks). After they would eat (i.e. when the white rice rushed their blood stream) they would put their heads down on their desks. It was kind of sweet.

I think Scarlet's having a harder time adjusting than I am. Being a native New Yorker she's LOUD. She likes to talk a lot. When Scarlet yells out a question at me, they kind of look at each other like, “What is this creature?” One of them asked her where she was from and when she said New York they replied, “Ahh, New York” as if that explained everything!

After work we went to find a place to eat dinner. We stopped into an electronics store first. It was the first kind of “Best Buy” store I'd seen here. The products were all good. There were no customers and about 25 employees milling around the store. Very odd. I need an iron but I think that basement market will be cheaper.

We crossed the street and found a really nice restaurant. There were two doormen and they were really waving their hands around like we needed to go in there. I'm SO happy we did! It was great! It was a Korean restaurant that Scarlet said was “heavily Chinese influenced.” Some of the women in there were wearing those traditional dresses that Scarlet said had to have come from North Korea. The place was really big and bright with lots of orange colors. A woman sat us who spoke some limited English. When I asked her, “How are you tonight?” she seemed really embarrassed. She didn't understand.

This place had the best service of anywhere we've been and it was like they really wanted us in there. We looked at the menu and Scarlet knew all these foods, being Korean. Scarlet and I split this beef dish that you cook on the tabletop. They bring over a bucket of hot coals and lower them into the table. You can cook it at any temperature you want. I went well done! The meat was so good! They bring some lettuce leaves and you can roll the meat and apply some sauces. Yum. Scarlet ordered two other meals for herself, a rice dish and this pancake/pizza thing. We will definitely be going back here! Wouldn't it be funny if my favorite restaurant in China was Korean?

Morning rush hours are crazy here. What I could walk in 20 minutes takes an hour in a bus or a car. Riding the bus is really neat though. I love studying people on their way to work. There was a cute little Chinese boy on the bus who was balling his eyes out. I think he probably realized he was en route to school. His dad kept pointing at me and made the boy look at me. It made him stop crying but he seemed kinda afraid too. I kept saying “Hello.” Scarlet wanted to give him some chocolate that she had in her purse but I didn't think it would go over real well, you know?

When we got to the office and settled into our desks, Scarlet popped up in my Gmail Chat. She pointed out that all of our Chinese colleagues were wearing the exact same clothes as yesterday. It was true. It really broke my heart. As Americans we are so incredibly blessed with fortune and opportunity. And you have to figure these Chinese are some of the most advanced in their society. They are all college graduates, speak English, and have lots of skills. There's one Chinese girl who I'm sure thinks she's dressing “business professional” but it's more like a streetwalker. Imagine a purple miniskirt and the big black boots that Julia Roberts wore in Pretty Woman. Poor thing. Her name is Phoenix.

As Americans we are used to instant gratification. We want it now! In China you can't “have it your way.” For example, the tap water is undrinkable. This means that you have to boil everything first. Waking up in the morning to brush your teeth requires that you put a pot on the stove first (I also have a tea kettle type device). I was brushing my teeth last night and I ALMOST faltered. I was getting ready to rinse the brush under the faucet when I caught myself. I can't even imagine how sick I would have gotten. I'm sure I have lots of organisms living inside me know. As they say, what doesn't kill you makes you stronger.

The sun rise and sunsets are so beautiful here. Since we view them through the prism of the pollution, they take on a fiery red. I've never seen any like it. When I see the Chinese wearing the face masks, I always think, “What do they know that I don't?” The air here is so dry. I've never really understood that when people have said that in the past. “It's so dry.” Well, I do know. Some mornings when you wake up you're skin has flaked over night. China's climate gives new meaning to the term “chemical peel.”

Without regular Internet access you can start to feel really disconnected. I understand more about the worldview that most Chinese must have. I knew that the government was able to block a lot of Internet sites but I'm surprised at how effective they are. They must have a team of people whose only job is surfing the web and deciding which sites to block. For example, I have no access to most blog sites and Wikipedia. I asked Woojung if people here were aware of the controversy that arose around the world last month when it was discovered that China had destroyed one of their orbiting satellites to test their weapons systems. She said that some American tourists told her about it. When she went to the CNN.com web site and clicked on the story she got the “Page Not Found” message. I tried clicking on a story about an advisor to President Bush who wants Bibles placed in all the hotel rooms in Beijing before the Olympics. The article was in Christianity Today. Same result: Page Not Found.

Remember those people I mentioned who walk around with the red arm bands? When I was walking back from lunch today a group of young Chinese men were marching in lockstep and they were all wearing the bands. Hmm....

Scarlet and I went to lunch on Wednesday. We just walked up the road and found a place. They were very used to Americans and just pointed at where we should sit. The menu had pictures. Yeah! As always, the server stands there and you have to flip through the photos quickly. Nothing really stood out as being great. I pointed to a picture of some kind of meat dish. Honestly, I've had such good food experiences that I thought this would continue. Scarlet ordered a meat type dish. It was very odd and like strings of meat. She started eating something that looked like a napkin. She thinks it was some sort of noodle or soy thing. Finally my dish came out. Uh oh. I started pawing through it with my chopsticks. “What is this?” I thought. Then it hit me. It was starfish! It was cut up and bright orange. Scarlet told me that the Chinese consider starfish to be a delicacy. Uh huh. I basically decided to pretend that I was on Survivor and this meal would be my meal for the evening. If you've ever eaten anything like octopus or starfish you know how rubbery it is! It took forever to chew. It literally had no flavor. It was like eating rubber. I managed to get three portions of a tentacle down and I had to stop. I didn't like it, and more importantly, I needed to get back to the office. Chewing each tentacle would have taken forever. I pointed in my translation book to the Mandarin characters for “I'd like to take this home.” I also said, “Me fan.” This means white steamed rice. I had green tea and white rice for lunch. Dr. Atkins would be proud.

The starfish had been broken up into two different containers. I didn't want to throw it away. There's a young man here who's been really nice to me. I explained the situation and asked him if he wanted it. I guess I spoke too fast because he needed someone else to translate. He ended up taking the container. I decided to offer the second container to a woman I perceive to be one of the office managers. I stumbled into her office and she seemed startled that I was there. I explained the situation. She seemed very perplexed. She told a woman in Chinese what I was trying to do and they both laughed. As if I didn't know, she told me that there were “rubbish bins.” I explained that I didn't want to waste it if someone else would eat it. She started shaking her head. “This not our way in China. Please do not do this.” I felt really bad. “So, it would be better if I threw it away?” “Yes, please throw it away.” Oh-kee-dokey. Now every child in America can know that they've been conned to finish their meals with the “There are starving children in China” guilt trip. Don't believe it!

I decided to walk home through Longtan (Dragon pool) Park on the way home. A ticket costs 2RMB, which is nothing. It was so worth it. It's this really quiet, peaceful place of tranquility in the middle of this bustling city. There were some traditional Chinese buildings. I can tell that it's going to be a “hot spot” during the summer. They have those little boats you can rent and paddle out on the water. There also some amusement park-type rides. I'm looking into getting a monthly pass. It's less than five minute walk from where I live.

I had an interesting conversation with this young Chinese woman at my office. She's probably in her early 20's. She wanted to know if Brown University was a “good school.” I told her it was one of the best. She said she has a Chinese friend who is going there. She wanted to know if I had ever seen one of her favorite movies. She had to say it several times because I couldn't understand her. Then I did: Legally Blonde. I told her that I also liked the movie. She said that Reese Witherspoon's character in the movie became her “role model” after she saw it. She wanted to know if it “was true. Could it really happen?” If you've seen the movie, you know that Reese's character is considered a “dumb blonde” and then gets admitted to Harvard Law. I told her that in America it could happen. I said it would be difficult, but everyone has a chance. She thought that in the United States in order to apply for college you had to make a videotape like the character did. I said that was just for the movie, and that the universities require you write an essay in order to be admitted. We started talking about Reese Witherspoon and another girl joined the conversation. She insisted that Reese was “German.” I explained that she wasn't; she's from Tennessee. The girl looked confused and said, “But her name – Witherspoon – is German.” I went into this thing about how everyone from America is from different parts of the world and that we don't have “purebred” Americans. I said that if we did, Reese Witherspoon would be it. So funny.

I wanted to open a bank account in China. I asked the office manager if the bank across the street is usually open during lunch. She said that it was and wanted to know why. I told her I needed to open a banking account. “I do it for you.” What? “You can open a bank account for me?” “Yes, bring me your passport.” I could hardly believe that someone could open a bank account for someone else. A couple of days passed before she was able to do it because she got really busy. Lo and behold on Friday afternoon she handed me my ATM card. She gave me the pin number (the passcode is literally 111111) and a receipt for my initial deposit. She also told me that she had copied the receipt for her “records.” Mhhm...I better change that pin! I am the newest account holder at the Industrial and Commercial Bank of China.

Scarlet and I had our first lunch with the coworkers who sit in our office. It was so nice. They took us to a really nice place. It was so great not having to look at the menu. They ordered a host of things. Scarlet made the mistake of asking if any of them had “brothers or sisters.” They politely reminded her about China's one-child policy. One of the girl's wanted to know if Scarlet thought the policy was “harsh.” She tap danced her way out of that one! The Chinese guy next to me was very concerned about my diet. He told me that if there I was anything I wanted I was to tell him. When the food came out he even put it on my plate. He told us where to go to be with the “other foreigners.” His English is actually pretty good but he doubts himself and gets tongue-tied. He wants me to go to his house sometime and play video games. Should be interesting. One of the girl's demanded to know if I was born in Germany. I said that I had some German ancestry, but I am American. It's a really tough concept for them!

Scarlet had a bit of a meltdown at work. I need to be a bit vague here. Basically, a Chinese man in authority over her had been really critical of her work product and habits for the past two days. To the extent that he took her to a conference room to have a meeting. After the lecture, he told her that he was going to the hot springs tomorrow (Saturday). She was like, “Oh, that's nice.” Then he told her that one of his “friends, a colleague” was going along with another woman. She still wasn't really following, when he asked her if she wanted to go. She was caught totally off-guard. She told him she would be “more comfortable” if I went as well. He explained that there wouldn't be room in the car for me, and told her he would pick her up at Noon the next day. She came out of the meeting and was really, really upset. She started e-mailing me and wanted to know what I thought. I told her that it did seem as though this were a kind of matchmaking thing.

We were in a bit of a quandary because what if it wasn't something inappropriate? What if it was just a kind gesture? The Chinese have this whole concept of “face” where you basically can't embarrass them. To make a very long, emotional story short, I advised her to e-mail the gentleman and kindly decline the offer “remembering” that she had a previous engagement on Saturday and didn't want that person to “lose face.” He wrote back and said it was “Ok.”

We met up with Woojung that evening at Starbucks. We told her the story. She said that in China a young woman traveling alone is often considered to be “OK” for exploiting. The perception is that either you don't have a family or they don't care about you. Woojung said when she gets into taxis the drivers will often ask her if she's “alone” in Beijing. She always lets them know that her family is with her. Honestly, for as stressful as this was for Scarlet, I think it was a good lesson to learn. She's only 21 and has never really been sexually harassed or put in a difficult position like this. While what happened would never fly in the United States, it was also a good lesson in Chinese culture and the male/female dynamic.

I should mention that a Chinese woman sat down next to us at Starbucks. It was obvious she was listening closely to the conversation. When Woojung got up to use the restroom, she wanted to talk to us. She spoke very good English and said she likes to come to Starbucks to practice her English (at one point she did she say “No defense” instead of “No offense”). She was adamant that the man meant nothing untoward by this offer – it was a good faith “friendship” gesture. She went on and on about how there are good people and bad people in the world and you had to use your mind to combat them. She said Scarlet was a “very clever girl” for conceiving the lie to get out of going (it was MY idea!). I noticed that she was reading an article in English about global warming. It turns out she works for electric company in Beijing. She wanted to know if we had seen the Al Gore documentary, and we said we had. She seemed genuinely concerned by Scarlet's reaction to the incident and gave us her phone number. She said she wants to take us around Beijing and next weekend take us to a “special resort.” We'll see.

We left Starbucks and took a taxi to an area of Beijing called Ho High. It was an area of restaurants and bars surrounding a lake. Outside nearly every establishment there were guys begging you to go into their place. I'd read that they have really tough jobs and on bad nights will actually carry people in. They make no salary and only receive commission for the people they can bring in. I felt bad because it was so cold outside! We passed one bar and this guy ran outside and yelled, “American! Come in here!” and then he pointed at one of those neon Budweiser signs. They think we drink lots of beer.

We found an OK restaurant to have dinner at. I've learned that you can't really judge the food here by the appearance of the building. Some of the grossest-looking places have had the best food. This was a really nice, colorful place but the food was only average. I did like the chicken and peanuts. It was tasty. We ordered a barley tea for the table but I didn't care for it.

We were going to walk around and find a place to get dessert. We walked around for a long time and it was just freezing. We finally ended up on a street that was mainly just bars. We went into one to get out of the cold. It was around midnight now. I ordered a cup of coffee at another outrageous price (25RMB) and it was terrible. I'm about to give up on coffee here unless I make it myself! Scarlet ordered this hot strawberry milk drink. It smelled like hot Pepto-Bismol. We had a nice visit and then took a taxi home.

The Chinese are more interested in Korean pop culture than American. While they know some of our movie stars, they are consumed by Korean television shows and movies. The rationale that was presented to me was that US and UK entertainment is just “too western” for them to truly appreciate. They don't like the Japanese, so that's not really an option. But the Koreans make decent entertainment. A lot of the celebrity endorsements that are on products like bottled water and chips feature popular Korean celebrities. I did pass my first movie theater here and the posters outside were for Babel and Flyboys.

On Saturday, Woojung called and asked if we wanted to go with her parents to an antique flea market called Panjiayuan Jiuho Shichang. We said sure. We took a taxi to meet them at a nice hot pot restaurant (she texted our cell phone the address in Mandarin and just showed it to the driver). It was so nice meeting Woojung's parents. Her father is on sabbatical right now from a university in South Korea where he teaches media law. Her parents were extremely elegant people and so friendly. They insisted on paying for the meal. The food was SPICY. There was a box of tissues on the table so you could wipe off the sweat and blow your nose. I had to get up from the table twice to blow my nose.

Woojung's father has been traveling to Beijing for the past 40 years and he said the changes he's witnessed are incredible. He said there are increasingly new services being offered and the city is getting cleaner. He said the only thing that has gotten worse is the traffic gridlock. He said that China is extremely low in business productivity because of the amount of time it takes to make decisions. I had the opportunity to witness this myself. On Friday I was asked to attend a meeting with the Minister of Information at the Department of Foreign Affairs. I was only asked to attend the meeting because we wanted a large group present to show our respect. The Minister didn't attend the meeting, but it was his receptionist and what I perceived to be his chief-of-staff. Each side would speak for about 20 minutes, uninterrupted. They wouldn't stop and ask questions. They each listened to the other very, very intently. It's my understanding that the Minister had initially agreed to something big and was now asking to make the event smaller because he was scared of stepping on the President's toes. The meeting lasted about an hour and a half. Some kind of resolution was reached. The Chinese aim to make both sides satisfied in these types of negotiations. I think it's safe to say that an American meeting of this sort wouldn't take nearly so long.

After lunch we taxied over to the flea market. It was extremely crowded. There were rows upon rows of Chinese calligraphy, jewelry, ceramics, teapots, ethnic clothing, Buddha statues, paper lanterns, Cultural Revolution memorabilia (including Chairman Mao wristwatches), wooden boxes, furniture, pipes, etc. There are some real antiques scattered among the junk, but you'd have to be an expert to pick them out. Antiques made before 1795 cannot be exported out of the country. No one bought anything but it was fun to look.

On the way home we ran into a “vendor” on the sidewalk selling pirated DVDs. We had to look. Scarlet started freaking out because he had that new movie, 300. She really wanted to see it before she left the States. He was selling each movie for 7RMB – about 80 cents in USD. I was amazed at his collection: The Queen, Night at the Museum, Zodiac, Prison Break Seasons 1 and 2, and tons of other American and Korean titles. Scarlet bought 300 and I bought Blood Diamond. We had no idea what to expect of the quality. Blood Diamond was in mint condition. It was a dub of an Academy Awards screener disc. These are mailed to Academy members in the weeks leading up to the voting for the nominations. Twice during the movie text would come up on the screen saying that this was a movie intended for Academy members for private home viewing. I wonder who sold it? The DVD boxes were extremely professional looking – even sealed in plastic. They had the original movie art, critical reviews, and even a “proof of purchase” label. The only flaw I found was in the smaller text that lists the cast and production team. According to the box, the cast of Blood Diamond is Julia Roberts, Nicolas Cage, Meryl Streep, Paul Giamatti, Regina King, Bruce Campbell and Lily Tomlin. Were these actors EVER in the same movie together?

Scarlet's movie was filmed with a camcorder in the theater. She could hear people coughing and at one point the camera left the screen when someone obviously came into the theater. By the way, her DVD case lists the cast of Lady in the Water. Nonetheless, she got to see the movie. In order to ease our guilt, we have each pledged to buy the real movies when we return to the States.

I spent Sunday afternoon roaming the streets alone. I'm still trying to get a sense of my neighborhood and where everything is. It was the worst day yet for pollution. It was also slightly misty. Can you say acid rain? I found a park and went in. Lots of older people huddled in little groups, talking. I left after a few minutes because I got a feeling telling me to leave. Always trust your gut! It's rarely wrong. I also discovered something else by being out alone today. People aren't looking at me in most cases just because I'm an American. Most of the time it's because Scarlet is talking so much and is so damn loud. It's really jarring for them. When I was out alone today, I was just another person on the streets. It was nice to have that anonymity again!

My boss called that evening and wanted to know if I wanted to go to a pub. We said that we would go with him. We met him at our office. He brought his wife and another woman from work. We stopped first and had some dinner at a noodle place. I ordered what was essentially spaghetti. It was good though. We then went back to the same area where we'd been Friday: Ho High. Clearly, this is viewed as a must-go for Americans. We walked around and found a quiet place. There was a table of about eight Americans near us. I think maybe they were from Colorado because one of the guys had on a Broncos sweatshirt. We had a nice, casual conversation. I practiced some of my Chinese on them.

I found out that in the Spring our office will be having a retreat near the Great Wall. We stay with a local farmer who prepares a meal for us and we stay at his home. It sounds like it's going to be really fun and beautiful. Apparently, everyone sleeps together on concrete beds. Huh. And I thought Udall-office retreats were bad! At least I got my own hotel room. They said the retreat will allow everyone to get to know each other (I'll say) and we'll craft out an agenda for the next few months. Another retreat will occur in a different part of China in the Fall.


I have a feeling that I'm going to be giving Scarlet a “reality check” soon. She's 21, and like 21-year-olds everywhere, thinks she knows everything. She's an extremely bright young woman, but feels as though she needs to insert herself into every conversation and discussion. My patience is wearing thin. Usually my reality checks are not pleasant affairs, but I really think she will grow from this. She needs to know the truth before she heads to England in the fall. I'll be helping her really.